Self Perception
May 5, 2013
I’m a Suicide Survivor
The pain was so thick I could barely breathe. In an instant it would all be gone and I’d be free. I knew it was wrong, but that was not enough to hold me back. It was impossible to imagine what life would be like for those I love.
March 28, 2013
The Easter Dress (No MORE Tears!)
No one knows, better than my precious boys, about my yearly crying spells, stemming from innocent spring walks, through the forbidden section of Nordstrom. It’s the pastel pink, linen and lace... panties, tights and ruffles. Dresses displayed on tiny hangers. Smocked, layered with tulle or imprinted with the year’s color scheme.
February 8, 2013
Where’s Your Gaze
I have also shifted my gaze to the world, especially in this season. It is not what I wanted, envisioned or worked hard to accomplish. With my eyes focused on my circumstances life got heavy and depressing. I got self-conscious, insecure and critical...Like a crocus through a winter storm, I’m poking through.
January 27, 2013
I Am Worth It, Are You?
It is easy to look at someone else’s life and see what needs to be done. Sometimes we are even aware of what we need, but taking the steps to get in the right direction can require shifting gears and feeling valuable enough to make the investment.
January 6, 2013
Daddy, Call Me Pretty!
What girl doesn’t desire to hear that she is pretty? That longing can lead the purest of hearts into precarious places. Misleading arms entice her insatiable yearn to be valued. Her craving serves as a perfect channel for another’s satisfaction. Society has cast the illusion that females get the same relief from sex that guys do and that a one-night stand is just as fulfilling for her as it is for him. Girls long for intimacy. While we may feel satisfied briefly ultimately we are left feeling used and ashamed. Our self-image tanks as a layer of filth drapes our identity.
January 2, 2013
When Freedom Feels Impossible
Tremendous sorrow grows in a heart that feels abandoned to one’s addiction. If you don't love someone who suffers with addiction, you are possibly in denial or you are living an extremely unique life. The pain of addiction can be all consuming, it destroys quality of existence and often can be life threatening. It is tempting to explain to an addict that if they would just stop using, the destruction will stop, plain and simple. Tragically that is not how it works. It is hard to understand that addiction is not a choice, an addict is actually powerless over it.
